Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Love/Hate~Rethinking MY Thinking

I'm a daughter, wife, mom, friend, pastor's wife...teacher..artist...blogger..uh...well, the list goes on to include past professions and future ambitions, but...WHAT in the world am I thinking about LIFE?  Am I squandering it away sitting in my chair typing on this keyboard and concerning myself with things that really don't matter while LIFE is moving~active~NOT PASSIVE~but going and doing all around me? I have a love relationship with my computer and have had since about three years ago when I got MY OWN laptop~I'm on #2, (don't hate me...LOL) but WHAT have I allowed this box to steal from me and more importantly MY FAMILY? 

I adore my children and my husband. They are the MOST important ppl in my life~but when I have neglected them for the life of escape of reality in this world~whether it was crafting or some other EVEN WORTHY cause, I have left them to move into another realm. Yes, they are all capable of getting along without me for a season or time, but is THIS the use for which I have been created and the PURPOSE to which I need to focus my resources? I THINK NOT.

In fact, I am rethinking my methods and my goals. So much has gone on these past few months. First, we totally rerouted out schooling methods from a mommy based education where I educated them to an online public school done in the convenience of our home~we have remodeled space in our home to acomodate this change AND then all the changes I've personally done to work on my health~AND I FEEL better than I have in years! Sooooo now, it's time to ACT~to jump out of this chair and GO~LIVE~L I F E!  This chair and this cyberspace world IS NOT LIFE for me. I need activity and while I am so thankful for my readers and those of you who share my passions and interests, I must say that it all has to be put into perspective! PERSPECTIVE! PRIORITY~And I'm not overly OVERLY concerned with bloggy numbers, but let me CONFESS a twinge of pain when I read that so and so gets this recognition~so and so is TOP WHATEVER MOMMY BLOGGY PERSON...b/c FRANKLY this blog~this realm of life comes at too high a cost for so little (please understand) LITTLE return in the THINGS that MATTER! Things like my family and faith...MY BLOG is ONLY a tool..ONLY...and you know, it's NOT even MY JOB. For some it is~but by cracky if THIS IS MY JOB then where oh WHERE is the MONEY? Let me tell you, there are some busting down some bucks who do this, but I'm either NOT good enough OR God has other plans for me b/c either way~I tired of padding other people's purses, and so I do not measure up! NO, I DO NOT! Sooooo WHY am I still visiting blogs and participating in stuff that brings me very little? Is it that I AM THAT generous? Maybe. Maybe, I am. But what WHATwhat are my goals with my blog? AND WHAT PRIORITY should this little spot of cyberspace hold for me and my LIFE???

I'm really rethinking my thinking, and you know...I am believing that CHANGES are coming...stay tuned and we shall see...Right now, I'm gonna jump off here and go hunt down my dusting rag (...LOL...not exactly exciting is it?) and get going...Thanks for reading and offer up a few prayers that God will show me His divine will for my life INCLUDING my blog.
SisterT;-))